


Ladybug's Best Friends

by Nomolosk



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Crack Fic, This is out of character, seriously
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-14
Updated: 2020-04-14
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:01:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23655778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nomolosk/pseuds/Nomolosk
Summary: Lila Rossi claims to be best friends with the local superhero... only to get a bit of a surprise.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 20
Kudos: 365





	Ladybug's Best Friends

Lila Rossi walked into her new school ready and willing to make the best impression possible. Surely it wouldn’t be too hard. In her experience, people liked flocked to her when she knew important people and pretended to have an interest in the things that interested them. It wasn’t that hard, either- google usually gave her enough of an idea what she was talking about that she could fake it pretty well.

She walked up to a group of kids who looked like they were cool-enough, judging by their clothes. They looked at her curiously as they approached.

“Hi, I’m Lila Rossi. I’m a new student here. What are you talking about?”

They had been watching something on someone’s phone. An auburn haired, darker skinned girl held out her phone to Lila. “We’re talking about the LadyBlog, only the coolest blog about Ladybug and Chat Noir! I’m Alya Cesaire and I run it,” she said, obviously proud of her creation.

“Oh, of course!” Lila said, even though she had zero idea what the LadyBlog was. Her mom had just been assigned to the Italian embassy, and they’d been given a brief about the superhero situation. Lila was still a little fuzzy on the details, but she knew the villain was called Hawk Moth and the heroes were Ladybug, who could fix everything Hawk Moth broke, and Chat Noir, who usually ended up breaking something himself during every fight. Of the two, Ladybug seemed like the clear leader, so Lila leaned on that.

“You know, I… probably shouldn’t say this,” she said, mock humbly, “but I’m actually Ladybug’s best friend.”

The faces around her brightened, and Lila knew she’d made a hit.

“Oh, wow, that’s so cool, dude- er, dudette!” Another brown-skinned boy wearing a red cap and headphones said. “You’re in the right place, then. We’re all Ladybug’s best friends, too!”

Lila blinked, taken aback. Were they making fun of her? But the faces around her seemed open and friendly…

“... I’m sorry?” she finally asked, sounding hurt. “Are you making fun of me?”

“Oh no, dudette, nothing like that,” a brown-skinned boy with a red cap said. “It’s just that Ladybug is friends with all of us. She comes over to my house to listen to jams a lot. I make playlists for her Chat Noir to listen to on patrol.”

“Yeah, she’s savdusmorthnonce,” a tall girl with goth tendencies said, her words trailing off into an almost unintelligible mumble. Lila smiled brightly at her, with no clue what she’d actually said.

“That’s right!” a short blonde chick with a high, squeaky voice said. “And you know the last time, I offered to make Ladybug her own signature perfume… and she said  _ yes!! _ Prince Ali was so happy when I told him. He even asked me if I would donate some to his charity for an auction when I was done developing it.”

“Really?” Lila said, smiling and nodding, but inwardly cursing her luck. “And this goes for  _ all _ of you?”

“There is a 72.89 percent chance that Ladybug will come through my window on any given Thursday to play video games,” another black kid spoke up, pushing his glasses back up his nose. “And that’s up by 1.2 percent from last month.” He smiled slightly. “I completely destroyed her in Mario Kart. I still can’t touch her Ultimate Mecha Strike score, though. I think the only one of us who could come close would be Marinette.”

“And she gives me personal interviews all the time, like,  _ all _ the time,” the girl with the blog said. Alya, that was her name. 

The goth girl spoke up again, this time speaking loud enough to be heard. “She’s taking guitar lessons from my brother. We jam sometimes.”

“Hey guys! Talking about Ladybug again, I see,” a blonde boy said, walking up to the group with a short, half-asian girl. The other kids introduced Lila and explained what they were doing.

“I’ve given her fencing lessons,” the  _ really handsome _ blonde boy, who looked familiar now that she thought of it, said. “She’s getting much better at it! She’s almost to my level, and even Kagami has to put in at least a little effort to win now. I’m sure her miraculous still helps her out a lot in terms of speed and precision, but at least half of it has to be muscle-memory by now. I’m really proud of her!”

For some reason that caused the asian chick to blush. The frustratingly familiar blonde boy turned to her. “Hey, are you still making those patrol coats for them, Marinette? I bet they come by all the time for fittings.”

“Um, y-yeah! That’s fight- the rittings!” the asian girl sputtered. Her face burned brighter as she took a deep breath and corrected herself. Lila resisted rolling her eyes. The girl clearly had it bad for the blonde… but he didn’t seem to notice, simply watching her with a fond smile. “I mean, yes, that’s right. They come by for fittings. It’s not just the coats, you know, I’m also working on some gloves they can wear and still retain absolute control over their weapons even if their hands or weapons get wet. Those have been really difficult, especially Chat Noir’s, because his staff is most likely made of metal. But I think sharkskin on the palm and fingers is going to be the key there. And Ladybug asked me to make her some legwarmers, too.”

By this time Lila’s eyes were as wide as she would let them go. How… how were all these  _ ordinary _ teenagers so close with an actual, real-life superhero? She’d expected to throw them for a loop by claiming a friendship with one of the heroes of Paris, but it seemed they all had some kind of personal connection to her. Before she could really get past her amazement, it was her turn to spill. They all turned to her expectantly.

She laughed. “Wow, I didn’t know Ladybug got around so much!” she said, thinking rapidly. How best to impress them? “I mean, I guess I just thought I was special. She comes around to ask me for advice. You know, boy troubles and fashion…” she trailed off, noticing that the little asian chick’s eyes had narrowed quite a bit.

Alya, the blogger, raised her eyebrows. “Really? I’d think she’d go to Marinette for that- the fashion part at least,” she amended with a little chuckle and an elbow nudge for the asian girl in question. Lila made sure to remember her name. “We all know Marinette’s a bit of a disaster in the boy department, but we love her anyways.”

For some reason, everyone laughed except the gorgeous blonde boy, who just smiled uncomfortably. Could it be he wasn’t as oblivious to her crush as she’d thought him?

“But that’s still so cool!” Alya said then. “Maybe you could give me an interview for the blog? Ladybug’s fashion choices would get me tons of hits.”

Lila smiled. “Sure! I’d be happy to!”

“Hey, even better,” the blonde boy suddenly spoke up. “Why don’t we make a group video for the blog? After all, we  _ are _ Ladybug’s biggest supporters!”

Everyone jumped on that idea, even as Lila groaned internally. She had a feeling she was going to regret pretending to be Ladybug’s best friend.

\----

Lila was sitting in her room that night, ignoring her first day’s homework in favor of reading up on the LadyBlog. If she was going to keep up appearances with these kids, she was going to need to know more about the hero. She was in the middle of one of the interviews Ladybug had given the blogger when there was a tap, tap, tapping on her window.

At first Lila ignored it, thinking it was probably a pigeon or something. But then it came again, and then again, until she finally turned the window in frustration, meaning to shoo the stupid bird away. Only to confront the smirking face of Ladybug herself. For a moment Lila froze, wondering how and why the hero was outside her window. Ladybug mimed opening the window and Lila hurried over to do it.

“L-Ladybug!” Lila stammered, hating herself for that betrayal of weakness. “H-hi?”

“Hello, Lila,” Ladybug said mildly, levering herself over the windowsill. She stood up and Lila instinctively cowered a little, knowing what she knew about the lies she’d told.

“S-so what b-brings you here?” Lila asked after a moment.

“Oh, nothing much,” Ladybug said, unhooking her yo-yo and beginning to play with it. “I heard I have a new best friend, that’s all. Congratulations! And also, thank you,” she said.

Lila blinked. “Thank you?” she repeated.

“Yes. There’s a reason I have so many ‘best friends,’ you know,” Ladybug said, in a confidential tone. “Not everyone is willing or able to face the danger of Hawk Moth knowing they’re close to me. I like to spread out the danger among many. That way, I’m not too invested in any one person and I’ll be able to keep my cool in case Hawk Moth ever gets hold of one of them.” 

Ladybug smiled, but somehow Lila felt chilled instead of warmed. She hadn’t even considered how posing as Ladybug’s friend could put her into direct danger.

“I-I-I,” she stuttered. “Y-you know… maybe I shouldn’t call myself a  _ best _ -friend,” she said hastily. “O-or even a friend-friend! I mean, we’re more like… acquaintances, really!” she said, heart racing as Ladybug merely continued playing with her yo-yo. A yo-yo which Lila had seen Ladybug use to bash in the faces of more than one akumatized villain. And cut through the Eiffel Tower’s support beams. And create a net to catch falling objects like cars… or people.

“It’s a bit late for that, isn’t it?” Ladybug said brightly. She walked back to the open window, and swung one leg through, sitting on the sill for a moment. “See you around, Lila! I look forward to getting to know you!”

And then she was gone. Lila collapsed back into her desk chair, breathing heavily. On one hand, she’d gotten away with lying about being friends with a superhero. On the other, she’d just willingly made herself a target for the villain.  _ What _ had she gotten herself into…?

\----

“Sooooo, how did it go?” Chat Noir asked a few minutes after Ladybug returned, chuckling evilly to herself. When they’d met up for patrol that evening, Ladybug had mentioned seeing the video on the LadyBlog and being surprised to find out she’d suddenly acquired yet one more ‘best friend.’ They’d talked about it, and in the end only one action made sense.

“Well, I think she’s going to be a  _ lot _ more careful what she lies about,” Ladybug said with a smirk.

Chat chuckled. “Put the fear of Hawk Moth into her, did you M’Lady?”

“It’s only fair to warn her about the  _ consequences _ of rash behavior, don’t you think?” Ladybug returned.

“You are so evil,” Chat said, shaking his head. “I think that’s what I like best about you. It’s not just the saving of Paris, and the rescuing of my dumb butt, or even the fact that you are literally one of the hottest ladies I’ve ever seen. No, it’s that devious brain of yours, bugaboo, that has me purring at your feet all the time. I am a cat, after all.”

“Silly kitty,” Ladybug laughed, leaning over to boop his nose. “You know I’ve been working on this plan for a while. I had to do some major convincing for Master Fu to agree to it, after all. But really- our family and friends are going to be in danger regardless, so why not spread it out?”

“Speak for yourself, LB,” Chat said, crossing his arms. “I mean, I know my father would hate to be captured, but that’s just because he would lose out on his precious-”

“Ah-ah! No specifics!” Ladybug held up her hand and Chat’s ears drooped a little.

“Right. Sorry. Anyway, I think Hawk Moth would have a poor bargain in my father as a hostage. In fact, I’d be tempted to just let Hawk Moth have him! That man could probably shame him into giving up his miraculous within a day.”

Ladybug raised her eyebrows. “Really? That bad, huh?”

“Oh you have no idea. Be grateful for your pawsome family, Ladybug,” Chat said, leaning back on his arms to study what they could see of the night sky in the City of Lights. Silence from beside him made him look over at her. Her eyes were narrowed and her nose had that little scrunch in the middle which meant she was actively planning.

“You’re not actually considering it, are you?” Chat suddenly asked, alarmed. Ladybug started, then laughed a little ruefully. 

“No. Yes?” she said, then sighed. “Don’t worry, kitty. As much as I hope this plan of multiple best friends makes Hawk Moth target someone I can keep my head over, I wouldn’t knowingly put someone in direct danger- least of all your family, kitty. You might not like them much, but I bet it would still hurt to lose them. We can’t take that chance. I do  _ not _ want to see you akumatized!” She crossed her own arms, determination in every line of her body.

Chat relaxed again. “Thanks,” he said, on a sigh. He caught the faintest of whispers from her- it sounded like “again,” but since that didn’t make any sense, he didn’t let it bother him.


End file.
